I’ve just been out to the post office with Roo to post a couple of competition prizes and bundles of bits to a fellow blogging pal and sadly have just been judged by other mum’s in the village. I have fallen victim to the gossip girls it would seem.
Today I am not feeling great, it’s been a horrible ten days, for reasons of which I won’t go into because now isn’t the time or the place. Needless to say my hair looks a mess, I hadn’t applied a trowel full of make up and I shamefully am wearing the same jeans I’ve worn for the last five days and one of Daddy E’s oversized jumpers because it’s cold. Oh yes I am also wearing my UGG boots.
Off we trotted to the shops, Roo dressed in her Osh Kosh tracksuit but insistent on her Peppa Pig wellies. She actually looks cooler than I do.
We walk down, the exercise is nice and Roo can use her micro scooter. As we’re walking past the shops this gaggle of women, a bit like the witches around the cauldron in Macbeth turn to look at me. One of them has nudged the other and is raising an indignant eyebrow.
I walk towards them and overhear the conversation, “gosh she looks awful, I’d never go out dressed like that. ” Another one chimes in with “if you see me looking like that please take me home”. The final remark of “at least her kid looks clean” topped off this judging event. I felt like a non pedigree entry at Crufts. Relagated to the back of the room to have the other dogs shun me with their pedigree coats and superior breeding.
From my perspective I was simply popping to the shops. I had no idea that this ‘event’ had now become part of the social calendar for which I needed to glam up and look perky.
After hustling Roo into the shop, posting said parcels and purchasing a price inflated comic and some milk we leave the shop.
The women are still there. I can hardly contain my joy. Roo scoots off out the shop onto the pavement. This is when I decide my child is awesome on many levels. Why because for some reason best known to Roo she decides to power scoot. This means picking up extreme speed on her micro scooter and dipping down low. Often she can’t see things in her way she’s concentrating so hard.
In this case she power scoots up the path and directly into the path of witch 1 who is wearing white capri pants (seriously what sensible mother wears white anything). Witch 1 totters on the edge of the pavement seemingly unphased but then plunges spectactularly into the muddy puddle in the car park. Coating her St Tropez legs in a darker shade of brown and splashing the white, nay now cream capri pants.
My eyes wide I simply call Roo over, apologise to the woman and continue on our journey home. I have to love karma. It is a wonderful thing – gossiping and judging other mum’s however is not.